Communication - Sharing
Hearts, not Just Words
Real Love in Real Life - PART 3
May 21-22, 2016 • Chip Ingram
溝通 - 分享内心，不只是話语
在現實生活中真正的愛 - 第3部份
5月21-22日，2016年Chip Ingram
Introduction
介紹
It all started with “the car.”
The issue - Communication or Chaos
這一切都始於“汽車”。
問題 -溝通或混亂
I. Understanding The Communication Process
一，了解溝通過程
A. Definition: The Meeting of _______________MEANINGS .
A.定義：_______________有意义 的聚會議。
“Communication is the privilege of exchanging
vulnerabilities.”
Norm Wright
“溝通是交流敞開受傷软弱的特權 “。
諾曼·萊特
“Communication is the process of sharing yourself
verbally and nonverbally in such a way that the other
person can both accept and understand what you are
saying.”
Norm Wright
“溝通是以語言和非語言分享自己的過程，
以這樣的方式，他人可以接受和理解你所說的“
諾曼·萊特
B. The Complete Message
B.完整讯息
Words Alone = 7% of meaning
Tone of Voice = 38% of meaning
Facial Expression
Gestures - Posture = 55% of meaning
Total Non-Verbal
僅憑言語 = 7％含義
說話的語氣 = 38％含義
表情
手勢 - 姿勢 = 55％含義
總非語言
C. Five Levels of Communication
C.溝通的五水平
Type Description
類型 說明
Level 1: Cliché Safe, shallow, polite
Conversations
等級1： 陈腔滥调的對話 安全，膚淺，有禮貌
Level 2: Reporting Facts Refers basically to third Person
等級2： 報告事實 基本是指第三人
Level 3: Ideas or Risk begins here
Judgments (attachment of self with facts)
等級3： 想法或评論 風險從這裡開始（附帶自我事實
Level 4: Feelings and Laying self on the line
Emotions
等級4： 感覺和情绪 清楚表達自己
Level 5: Open Total honesty, “mutual understanding”,
Communication vulnerability
等級5： 敞開溝通 完全誠实，“相互理解”，敞開受傷
Taken from Why Am I Afraid To Tell You Who I Am? by John Powell
取自 -- 為什麼我怕告訴你我是誰？約翰·鮑威爾
II. Five Principles That Will Transform Your
Communication
II 將改變你溝通的五項原則
A. ____ ___________ BE HONEST- Speak the truth in love.
A. ____ ___________诚 实 - 用愛心說诚实話
...but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all
{aspects} into Him who is the head, {even} Christ,
Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of
you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another.
Ephesians 4:15, 25
...... 惟用愛心說誠實話、{凡事}長進、{連於}元首基督．
所以你們要棄絕謊言、各人與鄰舍說實話．因為我們是互相為肢體。
以弗所書4:15，25
B. ____ _________ BE ANGRY - Deal with anger appropriately.
B. ____ _________生氣 - 適當處理憤怒。
Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on
your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity.
Ephesians 4:26-27
生氣卻不要犯罪．不可含怒到日落．也不可給魔鬼留地步。
以弗所書4：26-27
C. ____ ______________BE DILIGENT - Work hard on your relationships.
C. ____ ______________勤 奮 - 努力於你的人際關係。
He who steals must steal no longer; but rather he must
labor, performing with his own hands what is good, so that
he will have something to share with one who has need.
Ephesians 4:28
從前偷竊的、不要再偷．總要勞力、親手作正經事、就可有餘、
分給那缺少的人。
以弗所書4:28
D. ____ ____________BE POSITIVE - Don’t wound with your words.
D. ____ ____________正 面 - 不要用你的話语傷人。
Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but
only such a word as is good for edification according to the
n正面eed of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who
hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were
sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath
and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you,
along with all malice.
Ephesians 4:29-31
污穢的言語、一句不可出口、只要隨事說造就人的好話、叫聽見的人得益處。
不要叫 神的聖靈擔憂．你們原是受了他的印記、等候得贖的日子來到．
一切苦毒、惱恨、忿怒、嚷鬧、毀謗、並一切惡毒、〔或作陰毒〕
都當從你們中間除掉．
以弗所書4：29-31
E. ____ ______________BE FORGIVING - Be the first to say, “I’m sorry.”
E. ____ ______________饒 恕 - 成為先說“我很抱歉”的人
Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other,
just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:32
並要以恩慈相待、存憐憫的心、彼此饒恕、正如 神在基督裡饒恕了你們一樣
以弗所書4:32
III. Practical Skills To Enhance Your Communication
III 提高你溝通的實用技巧
A. The Conference - A Tool For Listening
A.會議 - 一種聆聽的工具
Three questions:
1. What are you concerned about?
2. What do you wish?
3. What are you willing to do?
三个问题：
1.你擔心什麼？
2.你希望什麼？
3.你願意做什麼？
B. Word Pictures - A Tool For Understanding
B.文字的圖像 - 一種理解的工具
Discussion Questions
討論問題
1. What did you learn about communication that was
new or helpful to you?
1. 關於溝通，您学到那些是新的或對您有所幫助？
2. Which of the Five Biblical Principles concerning
communication from Ephesians 4 do you do well?
2. 從以弗所書4關於溝通的聖經五項原則，哪些您做的好？
3. With whom do you need to communicate better?
3，您需要和誰更好地溝通？
4. Which of the Five Biblical Principles of
communication do you need to work on?
4.五項聖經溝通原則，哪些您需要努力？
5. Which of the skills shared do you think would help
your relationships the most? A - The Conference or
B - Word Pictures. Why?
5. 您認為哪个分享的技巧最有助於您的人際關係？
A - 會議或 B - 字圖片。為什麼？
6. What specific step of faith are you going to take to
improve your communication with friends, family,
coworkers?
6. 哪些信心的具體步驟，您打算採取来改善您與朋友，家人，
和同工的溝通？
Resources:
資源：
• Communication: Key to Your Marriage by Norman Wright
• Relationships by Dr. Les & Leslie Parrott
•溝通：您婚姻的關鍵 -- 諾曼·萊特
•關係 --萊斯博士和萊斯利 - 帕洛特
Real Love in Real Life - Part 2: Communication - Sharing Hearts, not Just Words from Venture Christian Church on Vimeo.
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